It never dawns on me how long it’s been since I have written until people start coming up to me and asking about it. Then I realize how badly I’ve neglected “my precious”. Then I start thinking about alllll the blog posts I have drafts of sitting there ready to be published. Ugh. Procrastination at its finest.
Here’s the thing. It’s been a rough month or two. I am (just now) completely ready to admit that I have a problem with not asking for help, not accepting help, and most of all…not willing to admit I can’t do it all. Determined to be it all, I took homeschooling my kids this school year. This has been a rough transition but in all a great experience and it’s starting to flow pretty well.
But…then my heart and brain started talking to each other again…and with a still sweet whisper in my ear I felt the tug to start a small group for Moms in my church (in addition to the couples small group Hubby and I lead). It’s going wonderfully, and I love the connections we’re all making with each other. Outside of Christ and my family, this is where my heart lies, and it’s an amazing feeling when you’re walking a path you feel God is leading you down.
In the midst of all of this, I received an invitation from a friend to join a ladies bible study on Wednesday mornings. This one is an intensive year long study into the book of John. It sounded amazing, so of course I said yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes…YES! To all of it! I’m all in! Gonna get closer to Christ, be a better mom, wife, getting stuff DONE, YEAH!
Between all the Mom stuff and leader stuff, and bible stuff, and some health stuff…I’m drowning. The more I try to focus my efforts, the more I seem to fall short. The more I read and study and do, the farther away I feel from our Creator. I have decided that in this case, less really needs to be more. So after much prayer, I’ve decided to shave a couple things off my schedule. I simply do not believe that God wants us to cram so much into our lives that we forget why we’re doing it in the first place.
I have to learn to be satisfied with what I am physically and mentally able to do, and focus on that. Maybe things will change down the road and I can take on an intensive study, but for now I have to choose a simpler path to drawing closer.